It seems as if God's got his finger poised and ready to turn a page in the life of the Schultz'. One of our favorite people told us that this time in our lives would be just like that - like the turning of a page. Things would happen very quickly and all of a sudden there it would be, a done deal. We have found that word to be so true. Every part of this church planting adventure has happened just as if God turned the next page and made it be so.
It feels like we're there again. But we don't operate on feelings any more - at least not like we used to. It's a little more mature now - for lack of a better way to describe it. But the amazing thing is that God made us emotional beings and I think he enjoys feeling things with us and we with him.
We had two Thanksgivings this year. One with my family who celebrated early before my aunt and uncle went off to Bangkok, their next missionary assignment. The second with Jeremy's family and my parents. Talk about spoiled children - both sets of grandparents under one roof! How blessed we are.
Now Christmas is in the air. The girls see pictures of Christmas or see Santa or a manger and say, "Christmas!" They still have no idea what's coming, but we're going to have fun! We watched Caillou - that bald, whiney kid that makes me want to... Anyway, bald kid was experiencing all the stuff of Christmas and he went to sit on Santa's lap. I asked Soph if she would sit on Santa's lap. She watched the show very seriously and said NO at first. Then she said she would. Then she suggested Zoe do it. Those two are so funny! I love twins.
We had our first service to share about the church plant and to fund raise for Apostrophe. It was beyond words. To be talking to strangers who are praying during the service (perhaps for it to end soon... no telling lol ) and shedding tears (Jeremy was preaching so...). But they bought into the vision, the calling, this thing that is OUR lives. They gave their money. The entire church got out of their seats and stood around us to pray. They linked together with us to fight against the powers and principalities of darkness to take those students for Jesus. Dramatic retelling? I can spin a word, but that doesn't make the reality of this any different. We're in a battle and God tells us that it's not against democrats or people with "lifestyles" or recycled paper users. Those logistics are just distractions. Behind the opinions and choices are people who need my Jesus.
We shared that with this incredible little church who are called to adopt and foster kids with special needs and to run a school for them. They have teachers who volunteer! (And all the teachers gasp - I did.) They are doing what God asked them to do. We're doing what God asked us to do. We helped each other financially as we could. But we agreed to stand together and pray for what the other is fighting for in the name of Jesus.
We are seeing the power of Jesus like never before - simply the power of belonging to him and knowing what his name can do, the power of praying together, believing together, listening in his name, loving on his behalf. Life is getting simpler. I appreciate my husband more than I can express even to him. I see my daughters growing and we enjoy them so much! I'm able to let people be people and let God be God - that frees up an unreal amount of brain and emotional space. We're each on our own part of our journey with God - whether we acknowledge we are or not. I can't speak to or heal or fix anyone, but I can pray for, love and listen to ANYONE.
So here we are. Waiting to see what's on the next page. Will it be a new chapter or part of this same one? A new front door is an illustration we'll be seeing soon as our house here in St. Albans is ready to go to the next pastors coming to Church of the Rock. That's exciting for us and them! Praise God with us for our home in Burlington. All our birthdays are here - the girls are 2 years old January 21! Can you believe it, friends! God is gracious and good!
Stay tuned for the next page of bedtime stories from Vermont! : )
Thursday, December 2, 2010
Thursday, November 18, 2010
Mom's Red God Phone
My mother. How is it that she can speak one sentence and change the trajectory of my world? Oh that I will be like her one day. My brother always said she had a direct link to God - like the president's red phone. It's true. And not nearly as scary now that I'm not a hellion.
The last two days have been ones where a few floating pieces of what God's been doing came together to make some sense for me. I love it when God uses people to speak for Him and when He just lets a droplet of a thought touch you and soak in until you're swimming in Him.
Ah snaps! I just realized that my mom actually has a red phone... hmm.
I hope what God's sharing with me brings some encouragement and, more importantly, empowerment to you.
My mom gave me this very simple reminder: Nothing anywhere happens without God allowing it. Not even Satan moves without God's permission. The enemy can posture like a snake all he wants, but the TRUTH is that he's defeated. He knows it. He fights not to win but to destroy. Sheer hate. I know this but somehow it sunk in this week. It became part of what I KNOW. I've found myself responding and reacting differently to his irritations and all-out assaults - posturing. I'm not beyond God's reach. He doesn't have to try to keep me safe. I sense an authority lesson happening.
I've been reading Luke 11 and Matthew 6 and 7 over and over since we got here. It's about asking and knocking and receiving. It's about assurance that you'll receive what you need because God won't let His reputation be marred. It's The Lord's Prayer which is so elegant and passionate and simple - let people know You in ways that help them not to go on sinning so Your name is kept holy, let there be justice, peace and mercy, and give us what we need for today.
The term "little faith" really rearranged my faith. It's not referring to unbelievers; it's talking about doubt and fear and worry that doesn't jive with the disciple's calling. The way they were acting, responding and reacting was inconsistent to someone called to minister. They doubted God's protection in physical danger, they wondered if He would chose this time to quit providing. That doesn't work.
They had to KNOW that they could ask once for what they needed that day and God would provide because of their value to Him, because His reputation's on the line and He can't fail, and because His promises are bankable. They had to KNOW that it only takes once and then they could be about the ministry they were called to start. If they spent all day talking at God - fearing and worrying at God - then they'd never have accomplished anything with Him.
This is authority and faith to the max. What if prayer wasn't about telling God what you need, but thanking Him for His provision. Easier said than done when you're in rough times, but so freeing when you can honestly do it. There are more hours in the day when you don't have to carry the weight of God's provision You can be kinder and gentler. You can sleep. And you can begin to see borders to what seemed all-consuming yesterday.
Like I tell the girls, you have to choose to be happy, happy girls. You have to choose to be a girl of faith. That's so hard - the letting go. Thank God for moments when He speaks and all that you've been going through turns out to be yet another love lesson. I like the results. I'm done with the lessons. : )
The last two days have been ones where a few floating pieces of what God's been doing came together to make some sense for me. I love it when God uses people to speak for Him and when He just lets a droplet of a thought touch you and soak in until you're swimming in Him.
Ah snaps! I just realized that my mom actually has a red phone... hmm.
I hope what God's sharing with me brings some encouragement and, more importantly, empowerment to you.
My mom gave me this very simple reminder: Nothing anywhere happens without God allowing it. Not even Satan moves without God's permission. The enemy can posture like a snake all he wants, but the TRUTH is that he's defeated. He knows it. He fights not to win but to destroy. Sheer hate. I know this but somehow it sunk in this week. It became part of what I KNOW. I've found myself responding and reacting differently to his irritations and all-out assaults - posturing. I'm not beyond God's reach. He doesn't have to try to keep me safe. I sense an authority lesson happening.
I've been reading Luke 11 and Matthew 6 and 7 over and over since we got here. It's about asking and knocking and receiving. It's about assurance that you'll receive what you need because God won't let His reputation be marred. It's The Lord's Prayer which is so elegant and passionate and simple - let people know You in ways that help them not to go on sinning so Your name is kept holy, let there be justice, peace and mercy, and give us what we need for today.
The term "little faith" really rearranged my faith. It's not referring to unbelievers; it's talking about doubt and fear and worry that doesn't jive with the disciple's calling. The way they were acting, responding and reacting was inconsistent to someone called to minister. They doubted God's protection in physical danger, they wondered if He would chose this time to quit providing. That doesn't work.
They had to KNOW that they could ask once for what they needed that day and God would provide because of their value to Him, because His reputation's on the line and He can't fail, and because His promises are bankable. They had to KNOW that it only takes once and then they could be about the ministry they were called to start. If they spent all day talking at God - fearing and worrying at God - then they'd never have accomplished anything with Him.
This is authority and faith to the max. What if prayer wasn't about telling God what you need, but thanking Him for His provision. Easier said than done when you're in rough times, but so freeing when you can honestly do it. There are more hours in the day when you don't have to carry the weight of God's provision You can be kinder and gentler. You can sleep. And you can begin to see borders to what seemed all-consuming yesterday.
Like I tell the girls, you have to choose to be happy, happy girls. You have to choose to be a girl of faith. That's so hard - the letting go. Thank God for moments when He speaks and all that you've been going through turns out to be yet another love lesson. I like the results. I'm done with the lessons. : )
Monday, November 15, 2010
Mountain Moving Time?
I'm pretty sure you're supposed to have something to say when you blog. I don't feel like I've had anything to say about our "progress" for too long.
Have you ever had a time when you keep doing what you do day-to-day, your routine, and then look back at a week or a month and wonder why you're so spent when it seems you've done nothing at all but live. Days pass so you must be doing something but there's nothing tangible to measure. I keep believing that this time will produce a super me that's so much more equipped to plant this church. smile.
We've done a lot of difficult things in our ministry life. But this is so far beyond all that. This is easily the hardest thing we've ever done. We knew the tasks of planting would be hard, but never dreamed what the emotional and spiritual toll would be. It's all good because God has put safeguards in place for us, people we trust who continue to confirm what we're doing when we doubt. People who can keep us standing when we're sure we should quit.
My challenge has been to keep going with no emotion, no feeling attached to God. I know what I'd say to anyone who was having this experience. But that doesn't change what it's like to live it. I have to believe the truth of the Bible or not. That sounds duh for a pastor and church planter and Christian. I hate to even admit it because I should know better. Knowing is different than KNOWING -- the kind of knowing that makes it your knee-jerk reaction, your first thought, the way you respond and react.
I feel like I keep pouring all these day-to-days into this empty shell of me. I'm not really scared of this odd numbness that the absence of God's warm fuzzy presence creates. I'm excited to see what lies ahead, who lies ahead. I know that God has to be true to His word. I know He called us here. I know we are going to see Apostrophe Coffee open and Stand Church will happen - is happening. Lives are already changing despite my lack of feelings. That means that God is who He said He is. It means that He equips the called. It means more that I can put into words.
It continues to leave me still and without anything to say -- perhaps more accurate is that it leaves me without a way to say all that God's been doing in me. I'm learning to be the wife and mom and pastor that He intended, in that order. That's an honor. To be chosen. To be secure. To know my family is part of what God is doing in Burlington.
We've done a lot of things for God. This is something we're going with God. It's going to be amazing, life-changing to see how God provides for us. It's hard not to feel like we're stranded, but we're not operating on feeling any more. We have our Truth. The choice is mine to stress and worry and fear or to trust. That sounds simple. smile. It makes every email, phone call, dollar and prayer a major miracle in my life. It means I'm not stranded even though I don't have the answers or the way to make all this happen -- even to pay the bills. That's pretty basic for a self-sufficient person. It takes what I thought Faith was and raises the stakes. That's hard but now it's exciting. Perhaps we're about to see God's hand move our mountains.
Have you ever had a time when you keep doing what you do day-to-day, your routine, and then look back at a week or a month and wonder why you're so spent when it seems you've done nothing at all but live. Days pass so you must be doing something but there's nothing tangible to measure. I keep believing that this time will produce a super me that's so much more equipped to plant this church. smile.
We've done a lot of difficult things in our ministry life. But this is so far beyond all that. This is easily the hardest thing we've ever done. We knew the tasks of planting would be hard, but never dreamed what the emotional and spiritual toll would be. It's all good because God has put safeguards in place for us, people we trust who continue to confirm what we're doing when we doubt. People who can keep us standing when we're sure we should quit.
My challenge has been to keep going with no emotion, no feeling attached to God. I know what I'd say to anyone who was having this experience. But that doesn't change what it's like to live it. I have to believe the truth of the Bible or not. That sounds duh for a pastor and church planter and Christian. I hate to even admit it because I should know better. Knowing is different than KNOWING -- the kind of knowing that makes it your knee-jerk reaction, your first thought, the way you respond and react.
I feel like I keep pouring all these day-to-days into this empty shell of me. I'm not really scared of this odd numbness that the absence of God's warm fuzzy presence creates. I'm excited to see what lies ahead, who lies ahead. I know that God has to be true to His word. I know He called us here. I know we are going to see Apostrophe Coffee open and Stand Church will happen - is happening. Lives are already changing despite my lack of feelings. That means that God is who He said He is. It means that He equips the called. It means more that I can put into words.
It continues to leave me still and without anything to say -- perhaps more accurate is that it leaves me without a way to say all that God's been doing in me. I'm learning to be the wife and mom and pastor that He intended, in that order. That's an honor. To be chosen. To be secure. To know my family is part of what God is doing in Burlington.
We've done a lot of things for God. This is something we're going with God. It's going to be amazing, life-changing to see how God provides for us. It's hard not to feel like we're stranded, but we're not operating on feeling any more. We have our Truth. The choice is mine to stress and worry and fear or to trust. That sounds simple. smile. It makes every email, phone call, dollar and prayer a major miracle in my life. It means I'm not stranded even though I don't have the answers or the way to make all this happen -- even to pay the bills. That's pretty basic for a self-sufficient person. It takes what I thought Faith was and raises the stakes. That's hard but now it's exciting. Perhaps we're about to see God's hand move our mountains.
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